Random Shite

Category: Humour (Page 1 of 15)

Computers in Hollywood, never realistic… but fucking Jurassic Park is the worst.

You have a Velociraptor bashing (no pun intended) at the door, you need to lock the doors quick as it’s only Sam Neill holding the nasty little fucks back.

So what method do you think the brains behind Jurassic Park decided would be the best way to secure a big fucking metal door.

  1. A fucking lock on the door?
  2. A switch next to the door to lock it?
  3. A fucking archaic Unix graphic file browser where you have a 3D representation of the file structure, and you have to find the program to lock the doors?

Of course, it’s number three. For fuck’s sake.

Just interested in where the fire alarm is, the parent folder?

It is actually a real piece of software called FSN, or Fusion by Silicon Graphics.

Tomorrow you wake up as the opposite sex. What’s the first thing you’ll do?

This came up today on my Facebook page.

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I just happened to mention it in work this afternoon during the “funny hour” that seems to happen from 3pm to 4pm.

In the blink of an eye, without any break in silence, someone, and she will rename nameless, shouted out “have a wank!”

I was in tears of laughter as it was unexpected from someone who is apparently so professional.

 

The dangers of listening to The Living Dinosaur in work

I’ve ripped The Living Dinosaur‘s Holy Hallucinations series to MP3 so I can listen to them while working.

It’s just because he rips a new arsehole for everyone he crosses, he makes me chuckle away to myself.

However, listening to Holy Hallucinations 17 in work, I got to this point and laughed out loud in the office. He’s replying to some prick about how great the human species is, and then lists superior aspects of other species.

And this is the bit that made me laugh.

It just so happened that I started laughing just as a developer turned around, so I’ve made him a little paranoid 🙂

 

Me and my big mouth

Last week I happened to mention where the toilet rolls had disappeared to. The fact that half the development team are off sick and the other half are coughing, sneezing and spluttering in the office might explain where the bog rolls went.

Come Monday morning and this is the office toilet.

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Should last a few weeks.

Oh, and don’t ask why there’s a vacuum cleaner in the toilet 😛

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