Why would I want Sky TV?

I’m sick to death of people saying to me “you got to get Sky TV, it’s brilliant.” 

No, no, FUCKING no!

I have Virgin Media. 200 channels of shite as it is, why would I want the same 200 shite channels but with an extra 800 channels of shite?

Plus, I have a principle at stake. I believe Rupert Murdoch is a complete cunt, so no fucking way on this planet, while I still have air in my lungs, am I paying that fucker ANY money.

Well there is another reason. Our neighbour tried to get Sky but there’s a big fucking tree right in the way of the signal. Shame huh.